August 31, 2005 ~ 12:19 PM
Awww... my butt still hurts like hell.. And Brent thinks it's funny...
Awwww... I drove from my dorm to Olongapo for 4 hours. I was my dad's driver nung Monday kasi...
I was practically cowering behind the steering wheel (manibela, right?). Strada yun, 4x4 pero power steering naman. Pero in fairness hindi abot ng paa ko ha, kung di ako magmamala-spice girls na platform shoes.
He told me sa sembreak I could take it with my friends kung pupunta uli sila sa gapo. yehey!
Mayabang na ako, mahaba na hair ko hehehe. Di na ako gigimik na sasakyan ng iba ang dala. Heheheh. Sana makatulong yun maka-catch ng fafa.
Arrhhh... antay namin si Sir Jeff.. thesis thingy. This friday Im going to meet up with some guy... Wala lang, just to keep my mind off things. Mukha namang mabait, kachat ko for nearly 3 months na.
I know, I know, I learned my lesson na with Ryan Mico. Don't worry, this one's not a poser.=)
Thanks friends for always dropping by... Mwah! Mwah!
August 26, 2005 ~ 9:26 PM
It's not Jayson's friends. It's not Kamil. They claim that they didn't do it.
Ryan Mico keeps on messaging me. Trying to annoy me. But after a week of trying to hurt me, naimmune na ako. Natatawa na lang talaga ako, this time it's for real.
I don't know what to believe in. I do not know who to believe.
My attacker is a nameless face.
He keeps on saying he was a ghost from my past.
Damn. Who are you. I don't remember YOU. Unless...
Iginaganti nya ako.
But why would he do it?
I asked him that. After he destroys me, what now?
I am awaiting his reply. He is determined. He won't stop until I beg on my knees. But I won't.
For he's going to pay. He or she is going to pay.
And oh by the way, kung sino man ang nagtatag sa akin, wag nyo laitin mga kaibigan ko dahil ako ang makakalaban nyo.
Nahuhurt po ako kapag nilalait si Rhea Santos ni Mam Mamawal (Mam knows it, kasi inopen ko sa kanya), not because close kami ni Rhea, di kami magkakilala kundi well... kasi...
Nakikita ko sarili ko sa kanya.
What if maging ganun din ako tulad sa kanya... Sabihin na nating what if maging parehas kami ng achievements sa graduation, tapos sa GMA7 ko din plano magwork, tapos maging reporter din ako...
Tapos alam nyo naman ako, may pagka-slow at times.
Kung ako yung nasa lugar nya, naisip ko, ijujudge din ako ng tao, sasabihang dean's lister nga bobo naman, etcetera...
Kaya ayun, nahuhurt ako. Alam ko wala sa pagiging dean's lister yun, pero wala naman taong completely brain dead at bobo, lalo na kung magna cum laude pa diba...
Alam ko hindi lahat ng tao makakaayon sa akin, pero... yun lang.
Tama naman tlga, wala sa talino yun, sa abilidad. Pero hindi porke slow ang isang matalinong tao, it means bobo na sha...
Thanks.=)
Heheheh. Mananalo kaya si Rico este Ric B este Frederic Barrerra na batchmate ko sa Olongapo nung elementary ako at nakita muli nang ako ay gumimik sa Sibil Subic nung Summer?
Heheh, sa mga nagkakacrush sa kanya, ibibigay ko number nya sa inyo for free!=) Joke! Hindi, friends kasi kami in a way, kahit nag-away kami bago sha napasali sa P.B.B.
Ganito kasi yun, sa mga na nacucurious bakit tawa kami ng tawa ni Ria pag nababanggit si Ric B. Ay mali, Rico pala. Sorry hindi ako sanay sa screen name nya.
Kasi nung nagkita kami sa Sibil nung summer, ibang-iba na nga sha kesa nung elementary kami. Nerd sha noon, Grade 1 palang kami nakasalamin na sha. Pero hindi rin naman sha matalino, lagi sha sa last section noon, siguro tamad lang mag aral. Then suddenly, bigla sha nawala, yun pala nag-abroad para magtrabaho nga. Anyway, ayun, nagulat ako, malaki na ang katawan nya, nakasando sha nun mala Carlos Agassi ang outfit nya at hindi ko sha nakilala.
Tinawag nya ako nun.
"Kristine?"
Shempre ang weird, ayokong tinatawag ako sa 1st name ko. Sabi ko, "Do I know you?"
"It's me Ric B!"
Sinong Ric B? Isip ako ng isip. Tinitigan ko sha. Natawa ako bigla dahil sha nga si Frederic Barrerra.
Since that night, (nagpalitan kami number) lagi nya ako tinatanong kung nasa Olongapo ako dahil gusto daw nya magdate kami. At lagi nya tinatanong kung bakit ang taba taba ko na. (Thanks a lot, sa lahat ng napansin nya ay yung katabaan ko sa katawan).
Tapos one time nung umuwi ako Gapo, sabi ko nasa Gapo ako at kung gusto nya ba lumabas. Tapos nagreply sha na nasa ABS CBN daw sha at nag-aaudition para sa Big Brother nga. Natawa ako akala ko hindi sha seryoso. Seryoso pala. At nagulat nalang ako nung tumawag si Ria sa akin nung isang araw para sabihin na,
"OMG Mela si Ric B ba yung si Rico sa Big Brother!? OMG! HAHAHAH!"
Ayun yun. Heheheh. Yun na yun. The end of the story.
At hindi ko sha nakilala ng lubos nang hindi nauuna sa akin ang buong Pilipinas. =) Kaya kahit manalo man sha, ayoko shang kausapin o kahit na ano dahil ayokong isipin ng tao na kaya ko yun ginawa ay dahil nanalo sha or what. Saka ang pangit tlga, kasi if ever, kilala ang buong pagkatao nya hanggang Mindanao, at ako wala man lang akong alam tungkol sa kanya. Besides, maaalala pa kaya nya ako after nun?
Ewan ko nga ba kung palabas lang nya yung paiyak iyak sa ex nya eh. Weird tlga kasi dun sa Sibil todo bigay tlga sha, chicboy. Pero shempre ayoko sha i-judge, in fairness nakakatuwa din sha panoorin.=)
Good luck nalang sa kanya.=)
August 25, 2005 ~ 2:37 PM
I am actually believing that Steven is out of this. Well, I guess he is. He must be. But since I am accusing his friends as the people who did those mean things, I feel that he is responsible for too.
Besides, his reaction was normal. He's out of it, and blam, that's it, he says he's out if it. As simple as that. No over-reacting, no exaggerated defending of himself. Just that, "I got nothing to do with it" plain and simple.
But Kamil's reaction was different. Really suspicious. And she even brought another friend to comment using stupid ghetto english, sorry if there are "gangsta" people here, but there's a big division, some sort of an indication, wherein one will be able determine a fake, trying hard ghetto wannabe from a real ghetto.
Threats, threats, and more threats. Leaving nasty comments daw everyday on my multiply account. Woah.
If you are innocent, as in really innocent, you're reaction would have been, "I got nothing to do with that and pwede ba wag mo ako idamay sa problema mo?" and not exaggerated claims.
Unbelievable still. We are not withdrawing our doubts and arguments.
August 23, 2005 ~ 4:28 PM
Launching of 9th Avenue...
I have so many loving friends around me. Because of this blog, I also earned anonymous friends. Thanks everyone.
Kamil and her friends... They seemed to have a change of plans. They would no longer post my pictures in friendster na binaboy nila using MS Paint sa internet for everyone to see. According to them, prinint out na nila yung mga pics ko. And ipapamigay daw nila sa buong UST. Pati daw sa yearbook! Hahahah! Aww.. pathetic tlga!
natatawa nalang ako sa inyo.=)
Hindi ko alam kung anong kasalanan ko sa iyo o sa inyo. Aminado naman akong naiirita ako sa kafeelingan mo, pero kung yun ang kinasasama ng loob mo, I don't think I deserve such hatred. I couldn't believe insecurity will drive you and your friends to do this to me.
Kakarmahin din kayo. And the worst thing is hindi ako ang cause ng destruction nyo.
Marami nagmamahal sa akin. Sa inyo, meron kaya?=)
I'm here sa internet cafe ni Atoy, kumpleto kami... sila Mikel, Ria and Brent... And I am earning friends kasi masaya lahat ng customer dito... ako yung bagong kahera nila eh heheheh.=)
Life could never be happier.=)
August 22, 2005 ~ 1:14 PM
She was not exactly the lady you'd be pleased to see. Her smile would reveal overlapping teeth and her eyes are huge, almost bulging. But she was the kindest lady I have ever met, always smiling, always eager to see me and my brother whenever we go there to have our clothes washed. She also kept this huge male cat (yung street cat na marungis) and fed it, treating it so lovingly for according to her, it keeps her happy. But last night was different. She was not smiling at all. She was teary-eyed, not her usual self.
I was with Ate Belen, my dormmate, last night. We went there to get out laundries. I knocked on the glass window, surprised to see her sad.
"O Ate Wilma, anong problema?" I asked her.
"Carmela, diba abogado ang kuya mo?"
"Oo, bakit Ate?"
"Itatanong ko sana kung ano ang pwede kong gawin sa taong sobra manlait..."
Huh?
"Sino Ate?"
"Yung mga lalaki sa amin."
"Anong sinabi?"
So she went on, relating to us what happened.
"Babae ka ba talaga?"
"Pwede ba wag ka nang ngumiti kasi lalo kang pumapangit? Mukha kang hayop sa ngipin mo eh."
"Ah alam namin bakit mahal na mahal mo yang pusa mo, kasi yan lang ang nag-iisip na tao ka."
"May pumapatol ba sa itura mo?"
"Bagay kayo ng pusa mo, nga lang di ka pwedeng patulan kasi mas hayop ka pa diyan."
These are just some of the things she hears from those people everyday.
How cruel can people get.
I almost cried upon hearing her sad story.
I flared up. I wanted to kill whoever those people are.
"Carmela ano kaya ang pwede ko isampa sa kanila? Hindi ko na kasi kaya eh, sobra na ang panlalait nila sa akin," she interrupted my thoughts.
"Oral defamation Ate. Yun ang alam ko. Sasabihin ko kay Kuya pag nagkita kami.."
"May witness ka ba na ginanon ganon ka?" Ate Belen asked.
"Oo, marami. Maraming marami.." she answered.
"Alam mo ate, hindi lang naman ikaw ang nagaganyan. Mas malala pa nga ang ginawa sa akin," I finally blurted out.
"Oo nga Wilma, malala kay Carmela. Sobra," Ate Belen said.
I did not know if it would make her feel better that she isn't the only one who were treated so cruelly. But I told her nonetheless.
"Ako nga sinet-up. Tapos nilait lait, puro kabastusan pa Ate, mas bastos pa sa mga sinabi sa iyo. Gusto mo example pa eh, kaya daw malaki boobs ko kasi marami lumamas, o diba bastos?" I told her. "Pero ang pagkakaiba, mga babae ang nangganon sa akin, hindi ko alam kung mas masakit ba yun na binastos ako ng mga kapwa ko babae sa wala namang katotohanan."
She was shocked.
"Talaga? Ibig sabihin sa ganda mong yan at sa pangit ko na ito may nanggaganyan sa iyo?!" she exclaimed.
"Ano ka ba Ate, una sa lahat walang taong pangit, at pangalawa kung si Heart Evangelista nga eh binababoy din ako pa kayang hindi artista?" I said, now smiling.
She seemed to stop pitying herself already. I was glad. I made her feel that she's not the only one, na naiintindihan ko ang nararamdaman nya.
I wish I could go on and on. But my laundry was really heavy and it was late, 10 pm na. So I told her, "Wag ka mag-alala Ate sasabihin ko kay Kuya, si Kuya bahala jan."
She smiled, her first smile since I saw her. "Salamat Carmela ha, buti nalang kilala kita."
"Ikaw pa!"
I walked home, feeling happier.
Words are words. Once you say it, you can't take it back. Pero naisip ko, bakit kami magpapa-apekto, sino ba sila?
Siguraduhin lang nung mga hayop na manlalait ni Ate Wilma na magaganda at gwapo sila. Dahil ako sigurado ako na yung mga nambastos sa akin kamatis ang ilong na mga feeling magaganda.
Huli ka BINGOT.
They threatened to make a hate-friendster about me. O nasan na? I couldn't wait for you to make me even more popular you insecure dumb little bitches.
Going back to the topic, kung pwede lang sana na akuin ko yung mga panlalait sa kanya nung mga tao na yun.. ako nalang sana.
Grabe na talaga ang mga tao ngayon.
August 20, 2005 ~ 1:20 PM
Last week, this guy named Ryan Mico added me as a friend in my Friendster Yuki-Ya I , that is, my first friendster account. He's the 500th guy because apparently, somebody deleted me so I had the reason to approve his friend request. For the whole week (last week), he kept on emailing me via friendster, introducing himself, his work, his credentials, even dropping compliments for me. He said he was a bartender in Edsa Shangrila who owns a bar somewhere near Pier One. You can check his account for reference, his name there is Ryan Mico. His account is new, which is odd. He only had about 30 friends. He also claims he was a model. Of course, I assumed that he is someone who could be trusted. I happily gave him my number when he, take note, "pleaded" for it.
This week, we were constantly texting each other. He seemed like he was a very nice guy, telling me about his sisters, work, etc. But I have a hunch that something is quite not right. He seemed too nice, too unreal. And he kept calling me baby, sweetheart and stuffs like that. Last Thursday, I decided to tell him that I don't trust him and I think there is something wrong with him. I told him I was also not the type of girl he was looking for.
But his reaction was different. He asked me out, pleading that he will prove himself to me, that he will show me that he is a different guy. Of course naive as I was, I gave him a chance.
Fortunately, Jam and I had plans on Friday night. We were going to Libis to watch the launching of her friend Karl's band 9th Avenue. So I told Ryan that my only free day is Friday and I invited him to accompany us at around 11 pm.
So Friday came. Jam and I arrived early in Libis so we decided to eat in Pasto muna. It's just beside the Fuente Circle. Ryan asked where I was. I told him we were there na eating dinner. He said he'll see me later and that he couldn't wait.
After dinner, Karl approached Jam and I. Karl was a nice guy, we are actually friends now. "Kumare" ang tawag nya sa akin. He also introduced us to their vocalist Patricia and she gave me a heartwarming compliment.
At around 9 pm, Out of the Box, an a capella band, started playing. Coy Sison, one of my treasured high school friends, was a band member. I was so happy to see him and he probably felt the same way too that we practically hugged in the middle of the circle. It was embarassing, coz many people were there, but what do they care, I missed the guy.
After their performance, 9th Avenue started playing. It was about 10, and Ryan texted to say he was near. I told him where we were seated (on a table reserved for us just beside the stage) and what I was wearing. He told me what he was wearing too.
11:00 came. Still, there was no sign of him. I really felt that something wrong is going on.
"He stood me up," I told Jam.
"Duh, Carmela, nobody would do that to you, even the vocalist said maganda ka," Jam said.
"I know he's here," I replied. "I could feel it."
Jam looked around. I told her not to.
After 5 minutes, a text from Ryan: "I saw you na"
"Huh? San k b?" I asked.
"Honestly, kanina pa kita tinitingnan. You look like a whore. You are not my type. You are ugly. Feeling mo ang ganda mo?"
Huh?
Jam and I exchanged confused glances. She looked around again. But there was no sign of any guy in a green shirt and a yellow cap.
At first nakikipag-away pa ako sa kanya. But this person kept on texting insults, from panlalait to kabastusan.
"Ang cheap mo, desperada ka, haliparot ka, malandi ka."
He went on.
"Akala ko ba running for cum laude ka? Bakit ang tanga tanga mo pumayag ka kagad makipagkita?"
Now wait a minute! I never told him that! And that information was not even in my friendster account!
"What if I am a psycho killer you bitch? Or what if I'm a ghost from your past? Cheap ka. Worthless. Walang lalaking seseryoso sa iyo."
I started ignoring him. Anway, I was there to have a grand time.
Then something which really freaked me out happened.
My phone rang.
My dad was calling me.
"Dad?"
"Anak, where are you?"
"Dito pa dad sa Libis with Jam, why po?" Maingay so I couldn't make out his words. Katabi kasi kami nung tumutugtog na band.
"Anak, anak umalis ka na jan."
"What? Kasisimula lang halos..."
"May tumawag dito. Lalaki. Hinahanap ka. May pinagsasabihan ka ba kung nasaan ka ngayon?"
My mom grabbed my dad's phone.
"Anak asan ka?"
"Ma, Libis. Bakit?"
"May tumawag dito, ako ang nakasagot. Sabi, "Nandyan ba si Carmela?" Sabi ko "wala. bakit?" Sabi sa akin, "Alam ko, kasi nandito siya sa Libis. Nakikita ko sha ngayon." Sabi ko, "Who is this?" And sabi nya, "Kaklase nya." I asked his name pero sabi nya "Hindi na importante yun. Ang importante malaman nyo na alam ko kung nasaan sha."
The guy, who according to my mom has a husky voice, hung up. Then they immediately called me.
I felt as if binuhusan ako ng malamig na tubig. Whoever was the person who pretended to be a Ryan Mico was actually there. He knew my every move. I related everything to Jam. We were both freaking out.
But 1 am came, the band finished playing, and nothing happened. Just insults. More text insults. And he was miscalling me, for about 30 times!
"Ano suko ka na bitch? Why don't you reply? Busy flirting with men? Diba jan ka magaling kasi malandi ka?"
I ignored him. Until 3:30 am pagkauwi ko sa dorm, he was miscalling. Texting insults like an obsessed freak. Even this morning, during taxation class. But today was different. With the moral support and encouragement of my friends, with matching nakacircle pa ang mga upuan namin, we tried to solve the problem.
1. Definitely the texter is a girl. No guy would do that. If it were a guy, and he didn't like me, he'd just text one line : "Sorry you're not my type. Goodbye." And that's it.
No guy would say "malandi" or "haliparot" to a girl even though he does think so.
2. If not, the texter is a gay.
3. The texter knew me too well, that she knew my landline in Olongapo. Or because my family is prominent there, she could have found our number in the local directory. No one knows my landline number there, not even my classmates or friends in UST. Which brings us to the next number
4. She is from Olongapo.
5. She has cohorts. The husky-voiced guy who called my parents is her cohort.
6. It was well-plotted. The Ryan Mico account was newly created, too odd. And he was a member of Sibil Subic and Party Peeps which were friendster affiliations from Olongapo.
7. Ria was strong in her instinct that it was KAMIL. The rest agreed. I, was not convinced though. Here are my suspects:
My 3 ex's who knew my landline number:
Jayson- which Jam said improbable because the guy and I don't give a damn about each other anymore.
Angel- which I said impossible because we are living separate lives now.
Al- which is probable because he vowed revenge. Don't ask why, that's another long story. But he has a girlfriend now and it was a long long time ago...
These are their suspects:
1. Robert- Because upon rejecting him in a mean way, I had hurt his ego. And he has the means to know my landline because he has friends in Olongapo.
2. Kamil- This is definitely the most likely. THE STRONGEST CONTENDER. She has been viewing my journals and photos, even my profile in multiply.com. As if studying me. My face, etc. She hates me, I knew it and it has something to do with Jayson. Her friends are all from Olongapo. All gimikeras and insecure bitches.
Well both of them knew I was in love with a bar owner (Patrick). That was the trap. But Robert does not text that way. Matagal na siyang nananahimik. He's not the kind who will do that, though nasaktan sha coz he knew I was in love with Patrick. And he knew my cell number. He wouldn't go through all that trouble coz he is not pathetic. He respected me after all. He doesn't waste time with that at hindi sha pathetic.
I tell you all. Do not trust people from the net.
Kamil, haayop ka. Alam kong ikaw yan.
This morning, inamin mo rin na marami kayo. Na grupo kayo. And you threatened me na ipopost nyo sa internet ang binaboy nyong mga pictures ko sa friendster diba? Go ahead be my guest you bitch.
Stop being pathetic, you can never hurt me with your words.
I am far better than that. I am made to be a journalist. I am used to criticisms. Hindi ako nasaktan sa insulto mo, pero naapekthan ako dahil dinamay nyo pati magulang ko. Babae lang ang magplaplano ng ganun.
Screw you and your friends. Yung mga text nyo sa akin walang originality dahil yun din ang tina-tag nyo sa tagboard ko. You went all through that effort just to tell me I was ugly?
Tingnan mo mukha mo you insecure bitch. You emphasized not "being tall and sexy" to me last night? At malaki ang boobs ko na mukha akong pokpok? Na lust lang ang gusto sa akin ng mga lalaki?
Tingnan mo muna mukha mo sa salamin bago ka magsalita, ilong mo palang pamatay na.
Jerick, Steven, Doy, Thina, and the rest of your stupid, brainless, and airhead gang.
May nag-eexist tlga na Ryan Mico na malamang nakilala nyo sa Pier One Boracay. At ginamit nyo sha to get at me. Do you think I am stupid?
Jerick, asshole ka talaga. Pinagkatiwalaan kita. Wala na kami ni Jayson pero tinatrato parin kitang kaibigan. Stupid ka tlga, dahil sa iyo nasolve namin ang puzzle.
Hindi nyo pala kilala kung ano ang tatay ko sa Olongapo? O akala nyo lang talaga tanga ang isang anak ng isang prominenteng abogado na Judge Advocate General's Office? O alam nyo ba yun? Salamat sa pambabastos nyo sa magulang ko.
Steven, isa ka pa. Kaya pala tingin ka ng tingin sa account ko.
Like you said, I am running for cum laude. I couldn't believe people who came to lesser schools could underestimate me like that.
Uneducated insecure bitches kayong lahat. You got me this time. Watch your back. Hindi nyo pa nararanasan kung pano ako magalit.
At Jayson, gago ka. Alam kong may kinalaman ka dito. Pwede ba magtahi ka nalang ng gown sa shop ng nanay mo?
Kamil, pathetic ka you ugly whore. Sino kayang slut sa ating dalawa? Tell your pathetic friends too na sa susunod, harap-harapan kayo mang away. Sa akin lang naduduwag na kayo. It took you how many months to plot this? =) Half a year ba?=)
Assholes.
August 18, 2005 ~ 6:00 PM
The movie is not so "stunning" kahit all star cast sha. What made me say this? Well if you compare it with Band of Brothers, talagang makikita mo ang difference. Pero sabi nila, $8O M and ginastos for it ... pero it's good if you are crazy over war movies. And Cesar Montano played his part well.=) Paolo Montalban was actually better in portraying his role as a Japanese official. Gosh, ang gwapo nya dun. Dun lang sa movie ha? Heheh. Ang galing nya eh. Yung diction, yung gestures, yung facial expression... jap na jap!=) Anyway, mashado naman nilang ginawang tatanga-tanga at malupit ang mga hapon sa movie... Ouch! =)
Anyway.. Sometimes I need to keep my mouth shut so I won't put other people in a bad light. Itong incident kasi kanina, heheh. Basta.
Hmnn... I really really wanna go home. Coz low batt na ako. As in batt empty pala and naka-off na phone ko. Pinipigilan lang ako ng friends ko kasi mahahalata daw ng next prof na wala ako, at malilintikan din sila dahil sa magkakagroup kami sa thesis. Oh well.. Sacrifice.. Kung bakit pa kasi nagSamsung ako eh... wala tuloy ako mahiraman ng charger.
I hate what happened to Jama's grad pic... If I were in her shoes baka naghysterical na ako sa Red Images. Hindi naman kasi dapat sila nagreretoke ng pic ng walang permission sa may ari ng mukha. Ako nga sumingkit mashado eh. Kamukha ko si Pucca sa grad pic ko. Imagine, wala na nga akong mata pag ngumingiti, naningkit pa ako! Whoa!
Anyway, they called our names na. We have to log out... Bye peeps!
August 17, 2005 ~ 4:05 PM
I just realized that because of this blog, I don't have a private life anymore.
These strangers would just message me in YM claiming they have seen my blog, and God, they know me from head to toe. They know my life, relationships... I got nothing to hide anymore.
Whenever I go to the mall, I can feel people give me knowing looks. Or I'm probably just paranoid.
Maybe time will come when I will remove this blog.
I miss my friend Schuy. I know not all people like her. She's really not the most likeable person in the world, but she has done so many things for me and we have shared so many precious moments together.
About hate taggers, God. Who knows if they're just one of us. I don't buy the idea that they just stumbled on our blogs and decided to criticize us like we're a bunch of animals.
They're cowards. Insecure cowards who speak as though they're the most beautiful beings on earth.
I slept at 4 am na.. I finished this horror RL Stine pocketbook which I bought in Booksale. They do not publish RL Stine or Christopher Pike books anymore. I don't know why. Maybe they're both dead... Hope not. I admire them both.
Anyone who has John Saul books? I'll buy them from you at any price. I'm crazy over his works. He's a horror writer too.
Now Kamil is always checking my multiply account. What the hell is her problem? Didn't she know that I could see her face in the "People who last viewed your account" box? Why does she keep on checking out my pics?
Call me stupid but I just gave my number to this journalist who's in a rocky relationship with his gf. I don't know why I did.
I'm hungry. My stomach reminds me of the Sports Column that I haven't started written on.
August 13, 2005 ~ 7:33 PM
August 11, 2005 ~ 3:08 PM
August 10, 2005 ~ 4:03 PM
What am I doing? There's an exam tomorrow and I'm here surfing the net.
Nag"bomba" kasi sa dorm.. Ya know... to drive away mosquitos. It's silly that they thought of doing that in a day like this, and also in this time of day!
Unbelievable. I wanna go home and I couldn't because the smell is nauseating.
Multiply.com is a new fad now, I am actually enjoying working with my pics and profile. =) And the people are truer and more credible.
August 08, 2005 ~ 4:16 PM
That was Aron after my pic on top, the next pic is Ate and I in Pho Hoa, it was kuya's bday kasi last August 3, and that's my chubby brother right there with me sa 4th pic.=)
August 06, 2005 ~ 6:22 PM
Ano ba yan, showbiz na showbiz na talaga ang buhay ko!=) Hindi naman ako T.V. personality pero may isang tao na tinatadtad ako ng intriga hahahah!=) eh ano ngayon kung hindi ka nagagandahan sa akin? You're just one in a million! =) Hahahahah!=)
Thanks a lot guys for defending me. Hayaan na lang natin sha, dun sha nag-eenjoy eh. Malamang pangit yan, hindi natin yan kalevel.=) Tingnan mo naman, ginawa pa akong slot machine! hahahaah! Excuse me pero diba sa Casino lang ang may slot? Check your spelling please? It's supposed to be slut! Oh my God super tanga mo naman! hahahah!=)
Ayaw mo makita mukha ko? Eh di wag ka pumunta sa blog ko. Anu ba yan ang tanga tanga mo I couldn't believe pinapatulan kita.
Eh di cge, mukha na ako pokpok. At least nakaka-aattract parin. Ikaw baka ni langaw walang lumalapit sa iyo. Heheh.=) Hay, wala ka talaga magawa, nagmumuka ka lang tanga.
Tayo tayo nalang ang mag-usap at kayo naman talaga ang rason why my blog exists.. to share to my friends my thoughts and what is going on in my life.
Well... Kay Mitch.. alam mo minsan gusto ko nalang isipin na "Oo nga ibang level ang kagandahan ko" dahil talaga namang kakaiba. Why? Dalawa lang naman ang klase ng lalaki ang naaattract ko eh. Gago saka Gago.
Nakakapagod din. Kasi sa bawat guy na pinagbibigyan ko ng number ko, umaasa ako na baka siya na. Baka siya na yung hinahanap ko. Pero hindi.. Ang boylets sa akin, parang pera na pinapadaan sa kamay. Pero nagpapasalamat parin ako kay God, kasi hindi tumatagal pinapakita nya sa akin ang totoong kulay nung guy, kung gago ba, kung may ibang interes lang sa akin, kung bobo, walang sense, and so on and so forth.
Maybe I have that gift of being able to tell kung hindi for keeps ang lalaki.
Alam mo, hindi ko nga maintindihan ang ibang tao. Ang ibang girls. Yung mga naiinsecure at naiinggit sa akin when it comes to the matter of easily acquiring boylets. Coz it's not fun.
Si Voltaire? Cguro hahanga yung iba sa akin pag nalaman nila nag after almost 8 years, I got him to ask me out. Pero sa totoo lang, wala naman dapat kahangaan. Hindi na siya yung Voltaire na nainlove ako nung bata ako. Isa siyang Voltaire na nakabuntis ng isang 14-year-old, ama ng isang 1-year-old na baby girl.
Yes he got his own pad.
Yes he got a good work.
But look at the bigger picture. I finally got what I want and it is him. But I can never cope up with the fact that he has an obligation, and that obligation is not my kid.
Ayoko makipag-agawan sa obligasyon nya. Mas kailangan siya nung bata. Kung pwede nga lang ampunin ko nalang yung anak nya at ilayo sa miserableng buhay ng mga magulang nya eh. Gagawin ko.
This fact is not applicable to Voltaire only. Marami pang ibang ganyang boylets kuno na nakikipagkilala sa akin. Maybe for them, I look like the kind of girl who would be their sort of savior and accept them kung ano mang gusot ang pinasukan nila.
Tulad ng walang hiyang photo editor sa Red Images na kay kapal naman talaga ng mukha. I didn't even give him my number, kinuha nya sa info sa stub ng graduation picture natin.
Cge excused naman sha na pumorma kung wala shang sabit, pero alam nyo ba na may nabuntis na yun na babae? As in buntis palang yung babae, literal. Tapos ang kapal pa ng mukha mag-iwan iwan ng voice mail sa cell ko, at yayain ako lumabas. Tarantado talaga ang ibang mga lalaki.
Yung Icko naman sa Shakey's, na nagbigay pa ng complimentary pizza, nahuli namin nakikipaghalikan sa harap ng maraming tao sa tapat pa ng dorm ko. Obviously, hindi nya nirerespeto yung babae na kasama nya kasi naglalampungan sila sa liwanag, for everyone to see. Pero ang kapal nya ideny deny pa sa amin ang nakita namin.
Si Aron na taga Civil Engineering? May girlfriend na. Inamin din nya kinabukasan matapos nya ako habulin mula Uncle Pipoy's hanggang Lover's Lane.
Pare-parehas lang ang mga hayop na lalaki na yan. Sanay na ako.
Kaya sana wag na kayo magtaka kung bakit isang taon na akong walang boyfriend. Hindi ko yun ginusto. Marami kasi ang nagtataka, bakit daw marami naman akong boylets, pero wala akong boyfriend.
Marami lang ang lalaking tarantado.
Swerteng swerte nga ang susunod na magiging boyfriend ko eh. I have so much love to give.
Siguro hindi ko palang talaga oras. Bakit ba naman kasi ako nagmamadali..
Dead shot, even though I do not know you, you're a great friend. Easy lang on the Chinese... dati ganyan din tingin ko sa kanila. Pero kahit naman madisgust tayo sa kanila, hindi rin naman sila magbabago diba? Thanks for defending me on my blog.
Mitch, Elizel and Ria, the best talaga kayo, salamat ha.=) Mabuhay tayong magaganda!
August 03, 2005 ~ 12:37 PM
Miss! Miss!
I froze on my tracks. I didn't know whether I should stop walking or go on. I turned to face the man calling me.
And instantly, I fell in love.
I found myself face to face with the man who was calling me. He was panting, out-of-breath. Figures he had been chasing me from my dorm to lover's lane. Tall, with semi-kal hairtype.. Obviously a hunk but still had boyish characteristics on his features.
What on earth could he want from me? I thought.
I smiled. And asked, Diba kayo yung nasa Uncle Pipoy's? Bakit nyo ako hinahabol?
Itatanong lang sana namin ang pangalan mo... He said.
I noticed he was accompanied by another guy, also cute, but moreno and a little shorter than him.
Well to make the story short, they introduced themselves. The guy I like is Aron, while the other guy is Chase. Civil engineering students sila sa UST, 5th year na. Mukha na din silang mature. I told them my name. Hinatid nila ako sa A.B., asked a few questions about me...
then we parted ways after Aron asked for my number. I happily gave him my number of course.=)
Then uwian after taxation class kagabi, about 9 pm, he texted me, asking kung pwede ako ihatid ng barkada nya, gusto daw kasi ako makita uli ng buong barkada nya. Doon pala sila kumakain earlier sa tabi ng dorm namin at nakita ako ng buong barkada nya. So pumayag ako.
In fairness, cutie silang lahat ng magkakaibigan... Heheh.
And I was so surprised kasi ang dami na nya kaagad naresearch about me. Woah. Pinag-uusapan daw kasi nila ako sa class nila.
I'm looking forward to seeing him again. I mean, the last guy who has chased my for my name and number was Patrick the bar owner. And now Aron.. Wow.
The Dorm Medusas... mamaya ko na ikwekwento.=)
August 01, 2005 ~ 2:06 PM
1. Voltaire and I were texting all day long. He asked me out on a date. I am looking forward to it. Maybe my email "voltairelovescarmela@yahoo.com" will come true after all.=)
2. Icko, the cute guy in Shakey's, asked for my number. He and the other waiters there (who kept calling my idol) even gave us (Ate Belen, Ate She and I, by the way they are my dormmates who are very close to me) a complimentary regular pizza (Manager's Choice).
2. Out of charity, I bought a 2nd hand cellphone for Aldrin. I hope my friends won't kick my ass after they read this. For a moment, I thought he would hug me, but he didn't, he was still "composed" as always. He just seemed very happy and he kept on thanking me. I told him it was my spare phone, my pangnakaw just in case may mang hold up sa akin. I hope I was a good liar coz I couldn't look at him and my voice was breaking. What the hell is wrong with me?
It was too much in one day. Until now I am very happy.
I am a confused girl who is trapped between the past and the present
